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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
You'll never believe what the millennials did this time !!!!!
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You'll never believe what the millennials did this time !!!!! This blog has mostly been a archive for the various ways that millennials have RUINED our otherwise legendary society and check out what they've killed now . Ice tea . Ice tea is GONE . No more ice tea . Do you like ice tea ? Too bad sucker it's DEAD . You'll never have it again . If you think you have ice tea in the fridge think again , it's gone - no check right now . See ? Lipton , Nestea , Crystal Light and Snapple are all out of business as of today and all their employees killed themselves in shame and horror . Which is something you'd think would be in the news .  But there is good news and that is that millennials are done for . Corporate America officially no longer gives a shit about them and their dumb avocado-toast smeared faces . All they care about now is Generation Z and heretofore everything will be done to cater to them . How's that taste millennials ? You're OUT . This will sting them especially hard because they're all soft and sissified . Everyone says so , or they did anyway , no one says that about them now because no one cares anymore . Generation Z is what targeting marketing campaigns are about starting today because they have 22 billion in annual purchasing power . But 40 , isn't that nothing compared to the hundreds of billions if purchasing powers in (insert my generation) ? Shut up ! Your generation is OLD and WEAK no one cares what you do with your money grandma/pa ! Go generational analytical constructs !!!!!!!!!!!!!!  In my experience 100% of women I've dated or gotten to know well love ice tea . Can't stand the stuff myself . That's probably why I can't land a wife . This morning as I was walking into work I saw a squirrel laboriously dragging a bag of hot buns down the sidewalk . And I was delighted because you know life is a tough prospect - you have to fight for everything . And while you're doing that you still have to mow the lawn and change the oil and install a new toilet main and every other damn thing . But good things can happen . I mean a single hot bun is the find of a lifetime for a squirrel and this lucky SOB was walking off with a whole bag - and it was the 12 pack folks , not the six . That squirrel struck the mother fucking motherlode , it's got it made you know ? It's probably up to it's squirrel tail in squirrel pussy and/or squirrel dick right now . And while I may never find my proverbial bag of hot buns , it's good to be reminded that it can happen . I told this to some of my co-workers and while they enjoyed the tale one of them said "he's probably going to have a squirrel party" and one person laughed - but they laughed in the 'weird" way . So I thought "oh no , clearly 'squirrel party' has some obscene sexual meaning' . And indeed it does and it's NASTY . Can't anything be sacred anymore ? Must everything be perverted ? Next blog topic - having sex when you're sick Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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There is a faceless old woman secretly living in your home, and she has something she needs to say Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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Those buns will be full of nuts ...... I hope the squirrel invites me! Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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5/18/2018 4:48 pm |
Mellinials....
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100% of the women you’ve dated? Reeeaaallly?  Even if Snapple goes out of business there’s always the option of making regular tea with teabags, and then chilling it. I suppose most folks don’t plan ahead that well, though.   
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